Thursday, January 31, 2008

Howie After Dark

This month's FTOTZ mix goes out today to the delightful Diane Court.

01 - Fabio - About Romance
02 - RIAA - Pon De Re-Entry to The Moon (Rihanna vs. Jean-Jacques Perrey & Harry Breuer)
03 - Joe Simon - Let's Spend The Night Together
04 - Wendy & Lisa - Why Wait For Heaven
05 - Burial - Ghost Hardware
06 - Angelo Badalamenti - Dance of The Dream Man
07 - Romeo Void - Never Say Never (12'' Single Version)
08 - Scala - I Touch Myself
09 - ccc - Lucy at The River (The Beatles vs. Groove Armada)
10 - Fabio - On Humor
11 - unknown - Lick the Alphabet (Khia vs. Prince)
12 - Spacer - Contrazoom ft Alison Goldfrapp
13 - Erykah Badu - Honey
14 - Dinah Washington - Long John Blues
15 - Dolly Parton - Jolene (Divide & Kreate remix)
16 - Bruce Haack - Mean Old Devil
17 - Koop - I See a Different You
18 - Rose Royce - Bad Mother Funker
19 - A plus D - Good Enough For Heartbeats (Cyndi Lauper vs. The Knife)
20 - Panda Bear - Take Pills
21 - Fabio - Ciao

Leonine model Fabio Lanzoni is my favorite kind of famous person. A multimedia icon hailing from the Pia Zadora school of random celebrity, Fabio has given us so much: hundreds of romance novel covers, tasty I Can't Believe It's Not Butter ads, a score of self-deprecating film cameos (why hasn't John Waters cast this man yet?) and of course the roller coaster goose collision, although the Smoking Gun TV version of events is funnier. I enjoy all Fabio-based entertainment. Even his feud with George Clooney provided much needed relief from the writer's strike comedy drought. Anytime his moai-like countenance appears on a gossip blog or TV show it's like a hug from baby Jesus.
But it's his crowning achievement, Fabio After Dark, that inspired this tribute and continues to inspire lovers the world over. An album of cheesy quiet storm balladry interspersed with Fabio's breathy musings on love and romance, Fabio After Dark lets you hear the secrets of seduction directly from the master. A true classic, and I don't throw that word around lightly. Listen with a straight face if you can.

Pon De Re-Entry to The Moon - Mashup masters RIAA took a bland pop song by Rihanna and turned it into an insanely catchy ditty, with a little help from moog pioneers Jean-Jacques Perrey & Harry Breuer. From their 2007 album (free download!) Sounds for the Space Set.

Let's Spend The Night Together - Country soul crooner Joe Simon opened his 1976 album Today with this Stones classic but he took it somewhere way funkier. Worth hearing for the hilarious intro alone.

Why Wait For Heaven - Wendy & Lisa, best known for their work with The Revolution, have a post-Prince discography full of unheralded treasures. This slice of psychedelic pop is from their 1990 release Eroica.

Ghost Hardware - Mysterious producer Burial's unique variant of dubby, grimy UK garage sounds like futuristic film music from a haunted underwater city. (Music critics, eat your hearts out.) From his latest album Untrue, which graced many "best of 2007" lists.

Dance of the Dream Man - Composer Angelo Badalamenti is renowned for his soundtrack work with David Lynch. This tune is from the 1990 Twin Peaks soundtrack. Isn't it just too dreamy?

Never Say Never (12'' Single Version) - Art school new wavers Romeo Void had their biggest hit with this track in 1982, heard here in its unedited version from the 2006 compilation Never Say Never: Hits, Rarities & Gems.

I Touch Myself - Unlikely cover of the Divinyls gem by Belgian teenage girl's choir Scala, I first heard this track on Music for Maniacs. Seriously, do these kiddies know what they're singing about?

Lucy at The River - Masterfully blends Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds and Groove Armada's chillout classic At the River. From ccc's Sgt. Pepper mashup album Cracked Pepper.

Lick the Alphabet - The identity of the demented genius who mashed up Khia's My Neck, My Back with Prince's Alphabet Street has eluded me, but I found it at the awesome retro remix blog Altered Anthems.

Contrazoom - Crime jazz meets drum'n'bass with a cool Shirley Bassey-esque vocal by Alison Goldfrapp in the last third, this Spacer track appeared on the 1996 comp Pussy Galore.

Honey - This mellow retro soul single is from Erykah Badu's forthcoming album New Amerykah, due out next month. An extra cool video for this song just came out.

Long John Blues - I may never look at my dentist the same way again after hearing this double entendre-filled tune from Dinah Washington. Compiled on Eat To The Beat - The Dirtiest Of Them Dirty Blues.

Jolene (Divide & Kreate remix) - Swedish producer Divide and Kreate puts a fresh spin on a familiar Dolly Parton song. Found on his website, where many of his great mixes and mashups are free to download.

Mean Old Devil - Little known but highly influential electronic musician Bruce Haack has been called the King of Techno. This track can be heard on his 1978 recording Electric Lucifer: Book 2.

I See a Different You - A swinging electronic jazz track from Koop elevated by the ethereal voice of Yukimi Nagano. Appears on Koop Islands.

Bad Mother Funker - This funky little number by Rose Royce can be heard on Rose Royce IV: Rainbow Connection.

Good Enough For Heartbeats - DJ duo A plus D prove synthpop from the eighties and oughties can play well together by mashing up The Knife with Cyndi Lauper.

Take Pills - One of my favorite tracks from Person Pitch, the 2007 album from acid folkie and Animal Collective member Panda Bear.

Download Howie After Dark
Listening to:
Bruce Haack - Fantastic Skullastic

Tuesday, January 08, 2008

But Mommy, I wanna ride the Hobbler!

Can you think of a more offensive concept for a theme park than one devoted to recreating the experience of slavery? Reportedly one couple in Haiti (American expats, natch) are planning to build such an attraction. Someone please tell me this is a hoax.

A theme park where visitors 'play' the role of a slave could soon be a reality for guilt-ridden Europeans wanting to come to terms with their ancestors' brutality.
Memory Village will allow visitors to be bound and tortured at a resort in Haiti, which was a slave nation before becoming the world's first black republic.
Tourists can play the part of a slave for 12 hours, in which they get a feel for the hardship endured in the Latin American country more than 200 years ago.
They can choose if they want to be spectators or participants. If they take part, they will be given traditional African clothing and then 'kidnapped', chained and forced to march to a slave ship in a mock crossing of the Atlantic.
They will then be part of a re-enactment where slaves were taken to market to be sold and later broken down with torture in quarantine and put to work on a plantation.
Towards the end of the 12-hour stay, visitors will take part in a recreation of the slave rebellion which eventually led to the establishment of Haiti.
Americans Ron and Carla Bluntschli, who are behind the project, have set up a foundation to get Memory Village off the ground and have already raised enough money to buy half the land needed for their attraction.
Mrs Bluntschli said: 'Slavery is a terrible wound. Germany is still suffering trying to get over the Holocaust, and this is a Holocaust that happened for centuries.'
The couple, who have lived in Haiti for 22 years, need $700,000 (£350,000) in total to complete their theme park.

Previously: But Mommy, I wanna ride the Anal Probe!